Bad Cars & Worse Luck

Remember that time my car broke down when I didn't have my cell phone and wasn't wearing a bra?
Yeah me too.
I was reminded of it last night when MY NEW CAR BROKE DOWN TOO.

Allow me to explain...this was completely out of the blue. My car worked perfectly fine until about a month ago, when it started gradually getting worse and worse until yesterday when BAM! Broken. 100 to zero real quick (30 days, give or take 29 days).

I will admit, this is partially my fault. Percentage wise, I would say I'm somewhere in the neighborhood of 1% responsible, with Obama picking up the other 99. My car radio started flickering awhile ago and I didn't remember to tell my father until a few weeks after it started. When I told him I had been having issues he mentioned that my car had been recalled.

Oh.

That would have been nice to know. It's amazing how if I were to come home at 12:01 AM my parents would consider it incredibly dangerous but if I'm driving around the greater Durham area in a car that's been recalled for electrical malfunctioning, what's the worst that could happen?

Anyways, last night I was literally telling the story of how my first car broke down as I drove my friend Rene home. At this point, it's something I can laugh about. Or at least it was. As soon as I parked my car at my house, the entire computer system shut down. I couldn't lock it, turn on the lights, get my key out of the ignition, use the emergency calling system, and the worst part is I couldn't even listen to the radio. I know.

So, when faced with this adversity, I asked myself, who is an adult that might be awake? It was 12:30 AM. So I called my Aunt Julia. When it was assured that I hadn't butt dialed her (in her defense, my butt has a mind of its own and does knock stuff over unbeknownst to me with an alarming frequency) I informed her that I had called AAA and they basically told me tough cookies. Since I didn't require roadside assistance I wasn't really their problem. A friend suggested we push my car into the road and call back for roadside assistance, but that just seemed like an awful lot of cardio. We decided I should just try to remove the rest of my key ring and call it a night. Upon exiting my car, I was reminded of this ancient invention called manual locks that still exist. I decided to lock the driver's side door at least in an attempt to thwart whatever prowlers may be in the area.

Plot twist. Every single door is now locked. Not a huge issue since I'm pretty sure my computer system is RIP, but I had removed all hope of getting to the 600 plus candy bars in my trunk. (Donated for UNC Dance Marathon, I didn't just buy 600 candy bars, a lot of my current candy budget is being re-allocated to #SprangBreak2k15).

So here we are. I already knew I was a completely unqualified driver, but as it turns out, I'm not even qualified to own a car. Some people kill goldfish and houseplants. I kill automobiles.