Nothing But Respect For My President, Taylor Alison Swift

I thought last Thursday would be just like any other day. Thank goodness I was wrong. I was woken up around 9 AM by Emily who came to my door and gave me the news.

And for those of you thinking that Emily shouldn't have woken me up for Taylor Swift news...you're wrong. Not only was I appreciative of the update but also Emily has been my alarm clock for a few months now. It is much more pleasant to wake up to my roommate sharing a current event from the pop culture world than a digital alarm ringtone. I've even suggested that she download Fitbit to her phone so she can track my sleep in real time and wake me up at the optimal stage of the sleep cycle. She has yet to get on board with that.

Now this setup has lead to several conversations that I don't remember because I am still asleep even though my eyes are open. On this particular morning, after Emily told me that Taylor Swift announced she was releasing a new album at midnight, I apparently turned over, told her to "shut the *expletive* up" and grabbed my phone.

I waited impatiently all day until finally at midnight I checked iTunes and realized that it really was exclusively available on TaylorSwift.com. So I purchased the digital album and a physical CD from her website and really wanted a $65 sweatshirt but then remembered that I am a teacher. I waited and refreshed and refreshed and waited for the digital download to appear in my inbox. By 12:07 I couldn't wait any longer and saw that folklore was available on iTunes now so I bought it there too.

Let me just say...your fave could never. Honestly for everyone who doesn't get Taylor Swift, it must be nice having the emotional depth of a thimble. I'm in love with this album. It's a beautiful thing to be understood.

the 1

I definitely thought it was "tossing panties in the pool" until I looked up the lyrics to write this post. And in my defense...I have none.

cardigan

Yesterday I read The Light We Lost by Jill Santopolo and it really vibes with this song. If I had to guess what clothing item I am, I think I would be a graphic t-shirt, a comfortable and polarizing conversation starter.

the last great American dynasty

Instant fave. I love being the talk of the town and the socialite, see and be seen era. This song makes me believe that Real Housewives of the Atlantic Coast could be a thing.

exile

Let's all just take a moment and reflect on "I can see you staring', honey, like he's just your understudy" because WOW. This song reminds me of one of my favorite quotes about suicide, but in a good way? I doubt that will make sense to anyone.

my tears ricochet

This song reminds me of the list I have Emily keep of people not allowed at my funeral. I think Taylor would approve of this practice. Must mention that to my therapist.

mirrorball

These lyrics are reminiscent of Starlight and Enchanted and I'm here for it. And we all know how I feel about disco.

seven

7 is my favorite number so I had some high hopes for this song and my queen did not disappoint. This song reminds me of my own childhood, me and my cousins playing in the woods and finding ways to entertain ourselves.

august
August really does always seem to slip away doesn't it? Summer fades into fall before you know it. And I remember my days of driving around men who didn't have their own cars. 

this is me trying

"At least I'm trying" is like the angsty away message of every one of my relationships. Do the men ever try? Rhetorical question. Don't answer.

illicit affairs

I forced my grandpa to listen to the album with me and this was his favorite. Do with that what you will.

invisible string

After the revelation of betty I was so sure this was going to be the name of Sophie and Joe's baby but apparently they went in another direction. This is in my top 3 and makes me think that one day I will wish my exes well. But that day is not today.

mad woman

Okay I made my grandpa listen to The Man to prepare him for this song and I gave an impassioned speech about the ways women are represented by the media in our society and the double standards heaped upon us. Then my mom told me to cool down because she's a puppet of patriarchy.

epiphany
Not gonna lie this is not a fave of mine but you know, I think that as a nation America should treat veterans better so that is what I have to say about that.

betty 

Probably the most controversial song on the album to people who have not actually listened to said song. Also I'm a big proponent of f word inclusion so this song is a bop. 

peace
This song really connected to The Light We Lost too, maybe Taylor read that book. I love this chorus and I really have not had a moment's peace since I started liking boys back in kindergarten.

hoax

My other favorite...not sure what it is with me and suicidal lyrics. I mean love is a hoax. Also I love the word hoax.

Folklore demonstrates that Taylor Swift is, first and foremost, a storyteller. And a masterful one at that.

Here are my favorite songs from every T. Swift album and what percentage of the general population also lists them as their favorites...y'all have some bad taste.

Photos courtesy of Buzzfeed.